Why I consider embarrassment a strategy

I fell prey to being alone.

Neglected in the prison-pool of timelessness.
A precious resource that unfolded before me like never before.
I came into being as I came into loss.
And then, you returned.

I blamed you for leaving me alone in the first place,
unprotected and envious.  My needs mattering less and less.
The scales tipping towards those who demanded,
Those who prettied themselves, thinned themselves,
who appeared free, or should I say, unslaved.

What is it fair or not fair?

I had been given a role,
Afterall, I was given unilateral permission to have 'success' or become 'failure'.
As if I chose.  And IF I chose either? Or neither?
A split atom, a Schrodinger's cat... I might disappoint or even anger,

Falseness or truth. Despair or fashion. Drops or tides.
Alone I will say that, yes, alone. Alone while I waited.